"The Funny Farm and the Sorcerer's Stone"" (November 2006-December 2006) is a Harry Potter fanfiction written by Schmo and Sushi on the website Fanfiction.Net. First published on November 28, 2006, it is the first book in "The Funny Farm Chronicles" series.

Plot Summary Edit

The book opens up with eleven-year-old Muggle-born Hannah Schreiter receiving her Hogwarts letter. Excited, she calls her friends Rachel Hekman and Katelyn Barcanic only to learn that they, too, along with their other friends Tanya Rogers, Shelby Root, and Sarah Carter, have received letters.

As they are too inexperienced yet to Apparate or travel by Floo Powder or Portkey, the girls fly from Chicago, Illinois, to London, England, with Rachel's father as a chaperone. They shop in Diagon Alley and cause Madame Malkin to lose her temper. On the Hogwarts Express, they sit with Luna Lovegood and Hermione Granger, and help Neville Longbottom find his lost toad.

A turning point in the story is the Sorting. Rachel, Hannah, Katelyn, and Tanya are all sorted into Gryffindor, but their friend Sarah is sent to Ravenclaw, and little Shelby is sent to Slytherin. This marks the beginning of an irreversible rift in the friendship. Shelby begins to latch onto Draco Malfoy, and refuses any overtures from the Gryffindor girls to continue their relationships.

Despite this, the four girls find new friends in Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas. Rachel and Seamus, in particular, immediately strike up a sometimes less-than-friendly banter, a foreshadowing of books to come.

Main Characters Edit

Rachel Hekman: A tall girl with frizzy hair and glasses. She is described as "the smartest girl in Hogwarts after Hermione Granger." She is very strong-willed, and finds an excellent sparring partner in her best friend and worst enemy, Seamus Finnigan.

Hannah Schreiter: A short, pale girl with dark hair and brilliant blue eyes and glasses. She is quiet and intelligent, but occasionally loses her temper, which cows the other Funny Farmers into shocked submission.

Katelyn Barcanic: A rambunctious daredevil with a pug nose and glasses. She often attempts to break rules, but is held in check by Rachel, Hannah, and Tanya. She professes a heart of steel, but is actually susceptible to heartbreak.

Tanya Rogers: The Luna Lovegood of the Funny Farm. She is very Russian (with an accent), short, blonde with ice blue eyes, and is graceful and irrepressibly optimistic. She is notorious for her proneness to not understand jokes.

Seamus Finnigan: The Funny Farm's precious leprechaun. He is unusually tall for being Irish, has freckles, green eyes, and can speak a bit of Gaelic. His temper is infamously short, but otherwise he is mild and easygoing. He has an unfortunate tendency to fight for several weeks with Rachel.

Dean Thomas: A tall, rather grouchy boy. He is Seamus' second best mate, and stays at his home in Ireland every August. He is rather the oddball in the group, finding his preferences rather different than the others', in the way of food, television, and ethics.

Haley Schreiter-Wood: Hannah's older sister by four years. She is uncontrollably vivacious, and often has abrupt but rather comical mood swings.

Sarah Carter: A boy-crazy, rather vacuous Hufflepuff. She wears a lot of makeup.

Shelby Root: An easily impressed-upon Slytherin who quickly destroys her friendship with the original Funny Farm in order to ingratiate herself more with Draco Malfoy.